Online, Real Life , Platonic Relationships, BGRs & Strangers

It has been a while since I last blogged as I have been busy with the CorpPass migration of my clients at work. It was an exercise that my boss thought it was easy to do, and thought that I was chatting with the IRAS officer too much that she felt that CorpPass migration exercise was taking too much of my work time, and I could not complete my work. The truth is that the process had been a tough one and the system testing was unsuccessful, as a result, the 2 IRAS officers that were assigned to me had been following my progress closely to ensure that my firm was able to e-file for our clients come 1st September. In the process, these two officers became my friends, both of whom I have met in person. In fact, for one of them, I have met her quite a number of times at tax seminars that she conducted and at the CorpPass briefing I attended about 2 months back. Sometimes, I wonder, how I can make friends so easily, despite meeting them only a few times, or for some, I have not even met before in real life, like my fellow admins at TATA SMRT Facebook Group, I have not met most of them in person yet as most of us are busy with our work. In fact, some of you are wondering how we are controlling the group, we actually are controlling the group via WhatsApp group chat. I guess you guys must be surprised by the almost telepathic understanding that you thought we have known one another for a long time. =)

When I was young, I was taught to be cheerful and positive in life despite my disability. Although my views about human nature did change during my NS days as even though I was a clerk, I was bullied or so called “tekan” by various officers during my NS stint for 2 & a half years. I was glad that there were a few people that have helped me go through the NS stint. 1 of them was my Secondary School friend, whom I am still in touch with till now. Another had stood up for me when someone was gossiping that I was interested in a gal in the camp. He assisted to fight back for me by telling those people that even though Paul has a disability, this does not mean that he cannot be in a BGR with someone he likes. I think those people was stunned by what he said, because after that the teasing stopped. This friend of mine ran into financial difficulties later and passed away about 10 years ago due to illness. During his stay at the hospital and for a few months after his passing, my mum and I actually helped the family financially to pay for his medical bills. This marked the start of why I always go all out in a friendship. I would actually help a friend who is really in need when they ask me for favours.

Talking about money can be detrimental to a friendship or relationship with people most of the time. I have been scammed of my money by strangers a couple of times. I had friends who refused to pay for friendly loans and owe me for a very long time. This is why nowadays I do not lend people money as I hate to lose friendships over money. The same applies when it comes to job vacancies in the firm that I work in. I do not recommend my friends to apply as several bad experiences of friends working in the firm and the friendship turned sour or in some cases, the person is no longer your friend, as her attitude or behaviour at work had pissed you and your boss off.

A guy and a gal can have platonic friendship. It is not only BGR. For my case, it is quite fortunate that I have quite a number of them. One of them, I had known her for about 13 years via ICQ. We are still good friends with each other, despite seldom meeting up. She is always there, ready to be my listening ear when I need it. =)

BGR is a relationship that some people may not want, or want it but Mr or Ms Right have not appeared yet. Although I tried going after gals before, it did not work out. Some people tried to introduce gals to me, it did not work out too. I am happy being single, doing my work, volunteering, managing my KTV interest group, but at the same time hoping for Ms Right to appear, not in a rushed manner. An elder once shared, you marry when the right one comes by, do not marry for the sake of doing it. I guess it is the right advice for all and I still stand by my belief that my Ms Right will appear some day. =)

Leaving you with this video by JJ Lin which is apt for this topic today.